brin_bellway: forget-me-not flowers (Default)
Brin ([personal profile] brin_bellway) wrote 2021-02-04 03:28 pm (UTC)

>>I've never noticed any particular depression with colds, other than what can be directly attributed to its more obvious effects: [...] sore throat, stuffy nose

I mean, if you'd asked me before the end of 2017 I probably wouldn't even have thought to frame it as "depression is a cold symptom". Since I had been depressed *always* and *only* when sick, I couldn't disentangle them: that's just what it's *like* to have a severe sore throat or a stuffy/runny nose. I wouldn't be able to wrap my head around the concept of having those physical symptoms *without* the sense that a lifetime of this wouldn't be worth living if I hadn't experienced it firsthand.

(I could sort of disentangle it in the other direction after meeting a bunch of clinically depressed people in the early 10s: I *did* recognise the similarities there, learned it was possible to *feel* sick even when you weren't having the physical symptoms that would normally make you feel like that. I felt very fortunate, to only feel like that a few days a year, and only in situations where I knew that it would be over soon.

In particular, the coping mechanism "postpone literally everything until it goes away" was not really available to them, and that alone would make things a lot harder. (I did once, in extremis, go grocery shopping with a cold, and it was a hell of an ordeal even *without* counting the guilt of exposing the other patrons.))

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