>>Long sleeves/pants: like a weighted blanket, but all the time.

Very true! I don't understand why people would want to not wear clothes. They're comfy. This also reminds me I need to look into getting a weighted blanket sometime. It sounds nice, and this is further evidence.

>>alternate "When pigs fly"

"On Saint Never's day" is excellent, but I am obligated by my vestigial sense of ancestral pride to favor "When owl's tails bloom" (Which is also adorable)